Valentine's Day - Lesson 1

It's about a week away from everyone's favorite Hallmark holiday; Valentine's Day. Regardless of the history of the day, it's turned out to be a 'buy all the mushy-gushy stuff you can to prove that you love your significant other' and the person that usually does all the buying is the man in the relationship. I'm not saying this is right, or that I don't show my man some love on V- Day, but its the truth. You know it. Get over it.

Now, this post may be pointless, as I'm not sure many men actually read this blog, but I do hope to make some ladies chuckle. Maybe, just maybe, your man with stumble upon this post and realize it honestly does not take much to please a women on this holiday. He doesn't need to break the bank. Yes, some guys will order two dozen roses, and have them waiting at your dinner table where he will spend $50 on a Filet the size of three fingers. Some guys will buy a $100, life-size teddy bear that will collect dust in your closet. Yes, some guys will propose to their love on this day, but that's a one time thing, and don't expect him to exceed that V-Day gift the next year. These are the exceptions to the rule. Women are easily amused, and just seeing you put in some effort is what she is looking for. She just wants you to acknowledge her, not necessarily the holiday. Let her know you care, appreciate, and love her.

Need some inspiration, men? [Ladies, take notes, start dropping hints.]

Buy a Card
Good: Hallmark actually makes cards that are .99. Wish her a happy V-Day.
Great: Take the time to actually find a card that truly says what you feel. There are people out there, hopeless romantics, whose job it is to write exactly what you are feeling but can't say. They do the work for you, you sign it. Boom.
Above and Beyond: Buy a card, and write your own message. Something personal, romantic. I know, scary right? Grow some balls and show us how you really feel or you will never have the chance to.

Go Old School...Make a Mix Tape
Good: Make her a C.D/playlist with generic love songs that she will still listen to all the time.
Great: Actually make her a personal C.D/playlist with songs that either a) remind you of her b) how you feel about her c) songs that mark milestones in your relationship (ex. a song that played when you just met, first dance, songs you like to get down to...ha, oh ya.)
Above and Beyond: You sing? You play an instrument? You know what to do. Unless you're bad. Please spare us the heartbreak.

Dinner
Good: Take her out. Doesn't even have to be for dinner. Could be brunch..or just drinks. Spend a little money, nothing cray.
Great: Make her dinner at home. Make it like a scene from a movie. Not that hard. Light a candle, set the table. Actually clean your place....
Above and Beyond: It's hard to go above and beyond without breaking the bank for this category. But I would suggest, if you met at a bar, or your first date was at a specific restaurant, take her there. Re-create those beginning moments.

Sweets & Treats
Good: Chocolate.
Great: Wine
Above and Beyond: Wine AND Chocolate. Heaven.

Flowers
Good:  A single rose.
Great:  A single stem or bouquet of her favorite flower
Above and Beyond: Have her favorite flower waiting someplace special (the dinner table, when you open the door, when you come home, on the bed...)

Just Take Care of Her
Sometimes a woman just likes to be catered to. Maybe she's been working a lot ; give her a massage. She's stressed; let her beat the shit out of you in Call of Duty. She's feeling down;Tell her you love her. Sometimes words are the only gift she needs. She's sick; Make her tea, pop in a movie, snuggle in bed, and let her pass out in your arms. << personal experience. it was lovely. Just what you need when you're under the weather.

..and when all else fails.

Buy Lingerie
Can't really fail at this. Go to Vicki's. Flirt with the sales associate. Tell her that your girlfriend has  about the same size boobs as her. Have her pick something out. Watch your girl squirm and giggle that you actually 'picked out a pair of panties' (besides who doesn't love a new pair of underwear!?) and later...watch her in them. It's a win-win. But you're going to pay for it. Those panties aren't cheap, my dear.

In the end, it's not about how much you spend. It's about you two as a couple. He should be able to pick something out that expresses his love/care for you, or fits your relationship. If he's a simple man, not so good with words, a single rose may be what you receive. But that's him. Simple, still beautiful. You need to know and understand that the fact that he actually acknowledged you, and in turn, celebrating this 'holiday', is a big deal. There are PLENTY of 'men'..eh hem...boys...who refuse to participate in any sort of festivities because

• "I don't believe in that holiday"
• What he really means: I'm cold. I don't do the whole love thing. Run. Leave now.
• "Why should I have to do something for her, when she won't do anything for me?"
• Uh, I'm sorry, but we put up with a lot of your manly gross habits and crap. We do a lot. And whose to say that if you actually were to do something for us, then we won't reciprocate the favor?
• "I don't have money" 
• Invalid excuse. I just told you what to do. Geez, you only have to spend like $2.00 on a card...
• "I don't know what to get her"
• If it's chocolate or made of grapes or sparkles or smells sweet or romantic or soft.... you're in the clear.

If you both have come to an agreement that you both will not be participating in this holiday, that's great! I just hope you are being honest with yourself, and that you aren't deep down inside hoping for a surprise.

Men, Good Luck. May you truly put some heart into this.

Ladies, I hope you are shown all the love you deserve.

<3